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Be careful when badmouthing an ex in a divorce settlement

When going through any type of emotional stress, Pittsburgh residents are just as likely as anyone else to want to confide in a friend. The ability to verbalize negative feelings can help one come to terms with what they are feeling. However, in delicate cases such as divorce settlements, laying one's feelings for other people to ponder may not always be the wisest decision.

Especially when children are involved, this sort of loose-lipped behavior can have consequences. The things told to friends in these times are sometimes angry and even hate-filled. Those feelings come from a place that isn't always thinking logically. When these statements get back to an ex-spouse, or even children, it isn't only the other person's feelings that can be hurt.

It's well settled that divorcing parents should seek to put their children first, and to make decisions that uphold their kids' best interests. Of course, this involves decisions involved in child custody agreements, but it is also a part of how parents treat one another. Divorce is a jarring time for children, as well as the parents making the split, and it is known to help if children can continue to see both of their parents as loving and competent influences in their lives.

This doesn't mean that someone going through a divorce settlement can't confide in anyone. Choosing one friend, or even a professional, who can be trusted not to pass the information on can be a great help to the healing process. Pittsburgh parents may gain by remembering to keep their focus on what is important, and what will continue to tie them together through their lives post-divorce: their children.

Source: The Huffington Post, "The #1 Reason Not To Be A Divorce Blabbermouth," David Wygant, Aug. 24, 2012

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