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Setting post-divorce boundaries for Pennsylvania parents

As most Pennsylvania married couples know, during a marriage, there are often very few boundaries between spouses. When that marriage ends, it can be hard to put boundaries back into place. However, it is an essential part of the divorce process, especially if the couple has children and will continue to have close contact after the divorce is final.

As the divorce progresses, both parties will discover what boundaries are important to each party. For instance, one party may realize that a phone call before just dropping in would be appreciated. Any behavior that makes one partner feel uncomfortable now that the marriage is over needs to be addressed. This is a brand new relationship that is being forged, and both parties should be satisfied with how it will be conducted.

Boundaries between the parties may move several times before they become comfortable. Hopefully, the parties will be able to discuss their needs when it comes to boundaries without anger or yelling. After all, those old behaviors weren't formed in a day, and new ones won't be either.

When the divorce process is predicated on a respect for the boundaries of each party, it can go much more smoothly. Decisions and compromises may be easier to make as well. Every Pennsylvania couple may decide that it would be beneficial to use the divorce settlement as a road map and "code of conduct" between the parties now that the marriage is over. Putting those boundaries into writing can make them more real and highlight their importance to each party.

Source: goodmenproject.com, "10 Tips: Divorce For Grownups," Kate Bartolotta, July 22, 2013

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