While divorce can be freeing, it is unlikely to be fun. Untangling your life from that of another person can be complicated, costly and painful.
To go from being Ben’s wife or Gerry’s son-in-law can cause us to wonder who we are anymore. Getting divorced will affect your standing with a whole host of people. You may lose in-laws as well as some friends you shared with your ex. Everyday events can become complicated too. Imagine attending your child’s school play for the first time after the divorce. Do you sit next to your ex or across the other side of the room? Who do the kids sit with when they have finished their part in the show?
While the end of your marriage is an excellent opportunity to redefine yourself, it can be challenging to think positively at the time. Once you know divorce is inevitable, you need to take action:
- Prepare financially: Assess your current financial situation. What assets do you have? What costs do you have? Then work out your future needs. Doing so allows you to find a path between the present and the future.
- Prepare emotionally: Assemble your support team and let them know what is happening. Keeping your problems to yourself is unhealthy. Divorce is incredibly traumatic, and you will need someone to lean on.
- Prepare legally: An experienced family law attorney can help you come out of your divorce in the best shape possible. They can advise you on your legal rights, help you set realistic expectations and fight for them while avoiding pointless battles.
One tool many couples use to ease their divorce process is divorce mediation. While it cannot take away all the pain, it can reduce costs, time and conflict.